I heard he fall sick. I felt so sad. I felt like going to take care of him. But I have to be strong. I know I have to. No sms to him, no phone call. But having friends to update me on his happening, I felt that I might just die right then. It is just a simple flu. But then it blown to an infection. And the next I know it has becomes so deadly that he is in the ICU. Man, how did this happen. And when it all seems like things cannot be worst, his lungs fail. And man, even if he recovers, he will not live long. All I can do is stay there. Yet can’t talk to him. I have given up going for any chemo, taking any medication. But soon, he left. Peacefully. But the look on his face, there is no smile, no trace of him. Just a face. I realize that when I broke up with him, he died already. Life don’t seem to go on anymore. Now I know how he felt. How could you be so stupid? O my dearest… all I did was so that you could live longer, but it seems that it is the other way round. O man, I am so sorry dear, so sorry. But don’t worry, I will join you soon. I promise I will. Please wait for me. I am going with you…