just saw SHE's mtv of Always On My Mind... then realise what it is talking about.

we have people we loved... people we were close to.... people who leaved an impact on our lives... people who left footprints... people who left scars... people who left memories both good and bad... all kinds of people....

nope i did not use bad gramma here.... yes all the PAST TENSES....

the song talks about how perhaps some how we have to leave these people... or perhaps... most of the time, how these people will leave us.... so instead of feeling sad.... feeling down.... and like wat most people will say, feel like can never love again.... but wat the song actually says is that we should be stronger.... because of the pervious love, we should be able to love stronger... n better.... this i find to be very true....

don u think aft one left.... n the courage to move on... with the endurence to want to get on wif live comes... one do get stronger n better n know more about love n love more... we are all on a journey to really know love.... love don only comes between two person in romantic sense... but brotherly, as a family, frens, buddies... all kinds of it.... all sorts of it.... the only thing is courage.... courage to pick up the pieces... courage to move on... courage to endure.... courage to say "ok... lets continue again...."

and so, i find it quite proper of me to post this here.... n now... i think i will be/ am undergoing a change now... right now... hopefully it will make me better... if it don then mayb that is where i will be goin... and if it does... well... i donno wat to say... haha.... well people.... here is when i start to look back on my life... on people who left impact on my life.... people who made me remember them... n people... well.. juz people.... haha....

i guess firstly let me post the song... hehe....

Always on my mind
如果解得开这难题　我会更加感谢爱情
不只是让我可以遇见你
如果还能怎样努力　我们不会为彼此可惜
相爱的却不适合爱下去
You’re always on my mind
你给的爱　是我心海　最美的澎湃
You’re always on my mind
你给的爱　证明我真的存在
如果能有什么送你　我也不会这样着急
至少有部分的我陪着你
如果某天能再相遇　千万别说你还在伤心
人都该学会复原的能力
You’re always on my mind
让我依赖　当我孤单　就唤你出来
You’re always on my mind　
心有你在　就会有力量再爱
这寂寞城市　再度寂寞了起来　
当紧握的手慢慢被放开
再看一眼　最爱的脸　
Baby ,Yes I love you ,but good-bye
Oh~流下来　泪流下来　因为爱留不下来
You’re always on my mind
心有你在　我就还敢梦想爱


ok this i know will sound weird.... in fact.... i donno lar.... juz suddenly though of her...
ok... u see... when i was in K1 or K2 rite... there is this gal.. well... i donno... i think she "likes" me... u know... those kind of when two small kids together that kind.... coz she invited me to her birthday party (i donno if she invited others or not) but anyway, kinda.... erm... donno her dad or her chuffer came n drove me to her house.... yes... i got driven there.... coz i remember only me in the car wif the driver.... n i was sitting behind... haha... anyway, it was a white mecs and ya... it was kinda a big wow... but not to me lar... coz at that time... i still donno mecs n all... but never like mecs anyway... haha....
back to topic... so ya... went to her house wif her present.... n all i can recall is that hers is a big house... in potong pasir.... haha.... yup i grew up in potong pasir... move back to hougang during primary school... well... ya... i guess she left an impact coz... of wat i said... cannot remember her... but,.... i know her name is LISA.... hehe.... so ya... here's to lisa~~

then went to primary sch.... the teacher i hated the most is the one i respected the most in the end.... well... we call her wu lao shi.... donno is mdm wu or wat... haha.... anyway, i hated her... force me... i don like people forcing to do things... but nowadays... listen more to some people... haha... she force me to do work.... study for chinese spelling... etc etc... got sent to the principal n vice principal office so many times that i cannot count wif my fingers... haha.... but funny thing is that i never got less than a band 2 for chinese.... she even commented that wif my bad spelling (0/100) and all... she is surprise that i do so well for CA... haha... it is juz that aft i left sch then i realise how stupid i am... haha.... here's to her...

next... well... frens first ba.... this guy named MAXIMILIAN.... max for short.... nope i did not steal his name... n yes he was my best fren.... since young... i am sure u haf this fren.... where u two will always create trouble... make lots of noise when not suppose to... n are the cleverest of the lot.... no? haha.... anyway, that us.... max n me.... sam n max.... haha... well.. we were in the same cathcism class (donno how to spell lar....) for p2 n p3... so like we create trouble... talk a lot... yet are the most knowledghable ones... haha.... the teach is in her wits ends... coz we talk... make fun.... yet she cannot do anything to us... coz we are good~~ hehe... well... too bad.... yup... max was my best fren... the only one i am looking forward to chruch for... coz of him... i guess he has not know how much impact he has on my life... but... i do enjoy being bad.... pss... my mom once came up during mass to slap me.... haha... that i will remember.... haha....

yup... so aft max.... there came secondary school.... well.... classmates aside... coz we... kinda haf this together thingy goin on... but... ya....

firstly, i got list down my close frens... anne pang, dominic tan aka donkey, and wayne lim aka an an.... (pronounce as wan an good nite the an) why?

anne pang.... same age as my sis.... n well... she was my sis's good fren... then when i got to the same secondary school as her... she took it to herself to be my "big" sister n "take care" of me... haha.... i still remember first day of sch... she was the one that showed me where to go n wat to do... haha.... thanks to her i am not as newbie as the others... haha.... well... we really grew close during the three yrs together.... i remember every morning will go her class find her... then go assembly together... hahaa.... same cca too (YCS) well... lets put it this way... she is so special to me that i actually wrote a compo in chinese bout her.... on how she helped me in school... hehe... yup yup.... mummy here is to u.... hugs....

donkey's next.... haha.... nth much to say bout him... juz that... he wans his freedom... who can stop a donkey from his freedom? rite.... haha.... no lar... i know my donkey will do watever he need to do to get wat he wans.... sometimes... it is juz wat he wans may not end up the way he wans it... hug hug donkey.... dominic was my best fren in sch... haha.... we are always seen together if we are not wif anne.... haha... n since same age so we kinda always get to b in charge of things together.... he is the worker n i am the planner... or sometimes the other way round... never the same... that is me n donkey... totally opp... n yet very close n good frens... haha... well dom... all the best in army... good luck in all ur future works~~

wayne lim.... an an.... the guy that taught me that as long as u r a monitor/ perfect, u can break the rules.... haha.... which *ahem* i did.... haha.... well he really is one weird guy (to others) as he really thinks differently... he drives anne up the wall more often then i do... haha.... but... he is nice... he remembers my birthday when others forgets... o ya anne too... muz give her credits... coz he n anne knows my sis too n anyone who knows us knows we share the same birthday... haha... so ya.... that wayne....

now teachers.... i guess will be like miss chong, mdm lee n mrs goh... haha... these are more important.... miss chong is like my good fren even until now lor.... haha... mdm lee is a motivator... she change my class fm a haha... well known bad class to one that she is proud of... proud to say she is form teacher.... mrs goh... ahha... i am scare of her... coz lazy me will always got something to do fm her.... haha.... wat to do... i am her "favourite" student... always call fm me over the PA system... haah....

next few teachers do play a part coz they were my sec 4 n 5 teach... N n O level... they see us through tears n laughters.... mdm woo my english, mr pang my maths, mrs ang my chem (fav.!!) me lai my physic (good looking) mrs chong my F/N... mr ong the cutest my geog... haha... he is more clumsy than i am... haha... well mdm lee is my chinese for ur info.... she likes to call us xiao pen you as in little frens in chinese.... coz we all act like small kids... haha,... =P i still do i know... haha.... ya.... i think they know how much they left in me when ever i go see them... haha...

i cannot leave her out... nope... not at all.... introducing the only gal i loved... with my whole heart n soul.... karen leong kai ling.... haha... sorry for typing her full name as u can see... i was really crazy over her... haha.... told too many people bout her liao... so juz leave her name ba.... hehe...

jasmine, serene, michelle... yan yan.... wilfred.... avirut... hui shan.... qian ni... haha... ya... these are people i remember.... people i got contact wif.... o n long xiang.... hehe.... stupid chinese chicken... haha... ya... all of u left a part of u in me... thanks....

well... YCS was one of my CCA... n it is the cca i haf most fun n well people i know in.... here are some that really left foot prints...

firstly, hui mei... my ah ma.... de qiang.... ping ping.... ya... these guys are great... thanks people... they help me n YCS a lot... in both our growth n screw ups... haha...

next mummy jenny, wan jun, johnson well... these are people i am closer to.... haha.... coz there are more lar like my DIs fm jenny jonathan Yi-Di aka ET, cam, jappy, baldwin.. haha 5 of us... wif jenny as our mom... haha... fun.... wan jun is someone... well... i once liked.... now good fren.... haahha... ya... really glad i got her as a fren.... =)

church frens.... well... not much... those that i am close to are like... benny, clare n mayb lecters kids.... jerry alvin n nat.... ya... nat... he juz found out he has cancer.... hiaz... pls pray for him k... =(


moving on to poly life.... actually i will say the list will go on.... but cut short is needed.... few people like amanda n michelle who helped me wif FYP... more on amanda lar... as we kinda became msn chatting buddy.... n then there is people in my class... last sem one... which i really adore hafing them n all... my drama mamas n papas.... people like my joanne n VJ n kiran.... elton gurmit and janice.... ya.... serene n eve... david n daniel.... etc etc....

n also... vir vir... my twin~~ hehe... my evil twin... haha... =P wes....whom we got each other worried over each other more times than we remember.... haha... alvin who really really is there when i needed him.... hugs... thanks.... n coz... all my others lar.... EXs.... n all my frens...

to a special person... i think u know who u r... thanks for all that u haf done for me... hehe... i will always b there for u... i promise.... hugs...


hey hey j.... hugs....