well... since it is out.... i can say it liao... b4 i burst....

ahem....

another one of my greatest regret in life... is not to do something sooner.... if only i did this.... if only i did that..... hiaz.... how i wish that i haf done that eariler.....

only in death do we see the need to change... do we see where we gone wrong... do we know that death is really something that cannot turn back....

third death for me this year... first, my grandpa.... then dar dar grandpa.... well... not so bad for dar dar's grand... but.... kinda.... sad to see that someone u see everytime u go to his house.... so healthy.... then fall sick.... sad y?? coz i haf been telling him to go n bring his grand to the doctor n no.. he got no time... fine... scold him liao... still the same... when i give up then bring.... then find out got problem... then donno wat happen?? then.... passed away....

lastly... donno wat happen.....
now... i wouldn't say we are close... coz i didn't really talk to her... mayb coz i didn't bother to.... mayb coz i am juz, as usual, will not talk to strangers unless i know them... perhaps... she is suppose to be the first i talk to befor hafin a reply... well... too late for that i guess....

same cca... drama.... she can act... if she dares to speak up.... only thing?? language barrier... y?? coz she is from china... now i don mind speaking to her in chinese... but sometimes.... well... we will be like.... talk a bit then nothing to say.... hiaz... camp.... it was great.... i didn't get to ask her how's my cooking.... i didn't even know if she tried... she is one of those "invisible" visible people... wat can i say.... we call ourselves the drama folks... y?? coz we are FAMILY.... not cca mates... not frens.... but FAMILY.... no matter how big or small a person is.... she/he is part of the family.... can't think of drama without her....

well... guess it is the little thing that makes us wonder.... makes us think.... so wat if everyone knows u... so wat??? at least she will be and is remembered by us.... i believe she is n she will be... y?? coz she has already been a part of me... one part i will never forget... she... small little one... makes us thinks so much.... makes us really really think....

i wanna post this thing to all of u.... if someone small were to die... will u b affected??? if u will make that person something big in your life.... n u may save him or her....

don take people for granted.... no matter how bad or how good you like the person.... they can't n may not b there forever.....

you know.... dar dar keep telling me to go back to him... coz he donno how long he will live.... i really donno.... he kept saying n telling me bout people dying juz like that.... i think i finally understand wat he meant liao... hiaz....

but... a decision is a decision..... once made accept all that comes your way.....

all people.... i love u... don do stupid thing ok....

by the way... i am saying this coz... my fren.... was found.... on the ground floor of a HDB flat....

fill in the blanks yourself.....

IN LOVING MEMORY OF ALICE.....
soft strong wind over my face
as i see your smile over again
perhaps it would be better this way
that, without a word, u went away
leaving behind a strange wide world
entering one, with grace and love
baby baby, one's innocent's lost
tonight i'll be the one forlorn
a day or two is good enough
a mth or so juz seems too much
a year will go like river flow
but stay u will as long as it goes
words not spoken, never to speak
feelings unfelt, never to feel
wonder now as here i stay
what will happen if things have stay
the way it was, the way things are
maybe know you not, i always will be
courage it took to take that step
but encourage's something that cannot get
if one had done what one had not
you will be right here with us
too late to say too late to do
so end this i shall with red and blue
blood may flow like water it be
memories of you, shall never cease...